As we navigate through life, there are times where we feel like we’re being shuttled from one challenging set of circumstances to the next.
Each situation demands your attention. Each has unique factors to be considered.
We navigate these situations to the best of our ability.
If we’re lucky, we resolve things in a way we’re happy with – one where we believe we exercised our judgment productively and are (hopefully!) better off than we were before.
Other times, we walk away with regrets. Whether we chose poorly or things didn’t go our way, it could have turned out better… but it didn’t.
Both scenarios have the potential to create baggage: an emotional & cognitive load we carry with us long after the moment has passed.
Successful decisions condition us to choose similarly in future. They create an expectation of continued progress. And, on some level, they give us something to lose.
Once we’ve tasted success, we want to experience it again and again. Anything that gets in the way of this is a threat.
Unsuccessful decisions create conditioning of their own.
Rather than biasing us towards repeating our actions, we can take the opposite approach. We place too much emphasis on the outcomes of our actions & write off the endeavour as flawed.
Our self-confidence can take a hit. Because if we’re the kind of person who choose poorly once, what’s to stop it from happening again?
And in our desire to leave behind those negative feelings, we can be pushed into reaction vs reasoned action.
We are not just a product of our circumstances. But let unchecked, our circumstances can define us – and anything we’re capable of producing.
The lesson here isn’t to ignore the wisdom of experience. It’s to learn the right lessons from what we’ve done. To set aside our ego’s need to be proven right, to explain away our failures, to protect us from harm. To take what’s useful and discard the rest.
Most of all, we want to lighten the load.
The more baggage we carry with us from one moment to the next, the more burdened we are by information which probably isn’t even relevant any more.
We can navigate anything successfully with a clear mind – no matter how complex or challenging it might be.
Likewise: anything obstacle can overwhelm us if we’re exhausted before we reach it.
Building our capacity helps. But the surest way to go further and handle things easier is to let go of the unnecessary.
Our ideas about why this matters. What it all means. What we need to do about it. Who we are as a consequence.
These stories are only worth what they give you.
If we can hold onto the things that give us strength and release the things that weigh us down, we’ll be infinitely more prepared to handle whatever life sends our way.